Lost in Translation, the English version

As we have established, my Love was born and raised in Cuba. When he came to the U.S. 12 years ago, he did not speak English. He is now fluent, but of course he speaks with an accent (which, by the way, I love and would not change for anything in the world.)
 

I often feel like Lucy to my Love's Ricky. (Note: When I first told him about I Love Lucy, he informed me with some disdain that Ricky Ricardo is an absolutely ridiculous and un-Cuban name.) He has never seen the show so my humorous references to it fail to amuse. Sometimes I repeat words that he has just said using his same accent as Lucy used to do. To his query of whether I would like any poultry for dinner this evening, for instance, I might say something like, "No, bebé, I don't think I want any shicken for dinner tonight."

Blank stare.

Anyway, sometimes a corrupted word is silly enough to permanently enter into our own personal lexicon. In general usage, both of us intentionally replace the real word with Papi's accented pronunciation of that word. The most popular of these is fuckus: to concentrate attention or effort. For instance, I might say, "Don't bother me right now, bebé. I'm trying to fuckus on reading this article." Then we will each say "fuckus" a few more times, giggling, a la Beavis and Butthead.

However, the accent barrier will occasionally tie us in verbal knots, like an innocent conversation about composting which quickly degenerated into the following:

"Some people have compost heps," my Love says.

I am confused. "Hep?" I ask. He nods and repeats the word as if I am a dullard. "Hep."

"Hep?" I say again, in a tone which is clearly asking for help. "Yes. Hep," he says evenly, not throwing me a bone. Rather than use the "say it louder and slower" method of making oneself understood, (my Love does not like to raise his voice) he just repeats the word or phrase relentlessly. Which has a mind-numbing and spirit-breaking effect similar, I imagine, to receiving repeated blows to the skull with a blunt instrument.

Clearly I need to try a different tactic. "H-E-P?" I spell.

He looks at me quizically. "Hep?" he asks.

I sigh. "Spell it, please."

"H-E-A-P. "

"Ooooooooh" I say, relieved that we have made contact and that this will all be over soon. "Heap. Compost heaps."

"Heap?" he says, frowning. "No, that's this," he says, pointing to his hip, quite sure of himself.

"No, that's a hip," I say, enunciating clearly in what I imagine is a helpful third-grade teacher-type voice.

My Love frowns at me again. "Hip? What's a hip?"

Comments

[Vextasy]

Brilliant and very funny. And audible too.

Reminds me of how my youngest son used
to hear words quite differently to his
brothers and sister. Once he’d grown old
enough to spell them out to us
we’d discover his interpretation was
often better than the real one.

Two of my favourites were:

“eye browns” (for eyebrows), and
“hand burger” (for hamburger).

[Stacia]

That is too cute! Do you still use those words with him, as a good-natured tease? Because I have a few that my brother still brings up from time to time.

To be fair, I am definitely not an aural learner. Can't remember a thing unless I write it down. And if my Love and I are having an informal Spanish lesson and he breaks out a new word, the first thing I say is "spell it." It's like I can't get it until I can picture it in my head.

[Vextasy]

We do, as a tease.

His brothers will never let him
forget. They treat them like stored
ammunition to wheel out from time to time.
But it's all good-natured.

[Vextasy]

"I Love Lucy" takes me way back.
I can recall watching Lucille Ball
in black and white on my grandparent's TV
set in the late 60s.

But was it "I Love Lucy", "The Lucy Show" or
even "Here's Lucy". I think probably the first
as I have a vague recognition of the title
card: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I_Love_Lucy.

But now you've triggered other memories.
What was that TV show that featured an
American woman with a sheep - a hand-puppet
sheep. Mary someone?

Perhaps I need to invest in some more
Wikipedia time.

[Stacia]

i vaguely remember the sheep, but I am bad with names and can't recall at the moment. I never watched that one as it wasn't on WTBS - the station that ran all the old shows before Nick at Night and TVLand - so I missed it. wait--sherry was her name I think.

My Love and I have been gorging on British shows lately - Monarch of the Glen, Ballykissangel, Hamish MacBeth (love me some Robert Carlyle). I have trouble with that accents sometimes, but love them!

[Vextasy]

Lamb Chop was the name of the sheep
and I thought that was the Mary Tyler Moore
Show but Google suggests it would have been
the Shari Lewis Show (you were right).

Monarch of the Glen is/was filmed
just a stone's throw from where my wife's
family comes from - a beautiful area.